Creating Space When Your Brain Feels Full
There’s definitely some science behind this unexpected feeling that so many women in their perimenopause years describe — the feeling that “my brain feels full.”
There’s not a single bit of space for another thought or decision, and if another request crosses your grey matter, there’s no chance of it fitting through the mess to get the slightest bit of attention.
Everything feels a little bit broken, a little bit foggy, and the brain is completely… full.
It’s strange that this is such a common symptom for midlife women, yet it’s one that’s massively overlooked in conversations about perimenopause.
A woman taking a pause representing mindfulness and clearing thoughts
Why Brain-Fullness Happens
While it feels like your brain (and sometimes not just your brain) is malfunctioning, it really isn’t. It’s going into a kind of protective mode.
There’s so much going on in our lives. Everyday responsibilities become overwhelming, hormones fluctuate quicker than the British weather, and we start to struggle to process emotions the way we used to. Then there’s the identity shift — you’re not quite sure who you are anymore, every sense feels overstimulated, and the thought of making another decision makes you want to cry, scream, or throw something.
No wonder your brain begins to shut down to conserve energy. All “non-essential” processing gets put on hold.
Just a few weeks ago, I felt this very way. It started as overwhelm, but what was really happening was that I had no room left in my brain for another thought.
After a call from my mum, who was asking some very basic, non-invasive questions after a rough weekend, my brain went into overload. I screamed to my husband that everyone was expecting too much from me, that I was just one person, and that Christmas had to be cancelled because I couldn’t face the last days of planning.
I didn’t cancel Christmas, of course, but it was just one thought too many, and my brain couldn’t cope. Every other decision felt impossible.
So, I did the healthy thing — cried, shouted (not at anyone, just to get it out), slept, and then reset. I got help planning, delegated where I could, and took each decision as it came rather than looking at everything as a whole.
That moment reminded me that my brain wasn’t broken, it was just asking for space.
The Unbelievable Lie of “Try Harder”
Why do we think we can just push through and try harder to get our thoughts together? We’ve always been able to power through before, so why not now?
But when your brain feels full, trying harder only increases the pressure.
You absolutely cannot create space by pushing.
You create it by pausing.
Pausing can feel like laziness, but it’s not. We’ve been conditioned to believe we should always be on the go, but the truth is that pausing is neurological self-support.
A journal with candle, symbolising brain dumping or journaling
3 Ways to Gently Create Space
1. Reduce the mental ‘in’ tray
Turn down the mental noise before you try to turn up productivity.
Try:
Silencing notifications to prevent unnecessary distractions.
A 10-minute peace ritual — a mindful tea or coffee, meditation, or sitting in the garden.
Choosing one thing to focus on. Instead of thinking about everything you have to do, say to yourself, “Let’s just get dressed,” or “Let’s just write a meal plan.”
I used this last one recently when I was due to visit an old client of mine. She’s 91, and I still visit her. That morning, I woke up with anxiety, overwhelmed by everything I had to do. I reframed it: Let’s just get dressed and see how I feel. Let’s eat breakfast and see how I feel. Eventually, I got to her house with a freshly baked loaf cake. It took energy, but it was far less overwhelming than staring at a long list of tasks.
2. Micro-completions
Completing the smallest thing possible clears a surprising amount of mental space. Those small things feel monumental when your brain feels full.
3. Externalise the chaos
Use the “brain dump” page from your Overwhelm Kit (coming soon — join the waitlist!). Or simply get the thoughts out of your head and onto paper, in a journal, or as a voice note so they stop spiralling.
Peaceful garden that represents peace and calm
The Flow Forward Approach
I created the Flow Forward method to help you create space through compassion, understanding, and self-love — not force or the “just get on with it” mentality.
Ask AI or journal on:
“What’s one tiny shift I can make today to give my mind breathing room?”
Give your tool some context, such as your name, age, time of life, and lifestyle commitments. Use this as a guide to start feeling a little more mental space, rather than following the long list of “shoulds” you’ve been told are the right way.
You don’t have to use AI, but if you’re struggling with clarity of thought, it can help support that load. It’s not essential though — a good jot down on paper or a voice note ramble can work wonders too.
Your Next Steps
Put your mental in-tray on ice.
Do one thing, no matter how small.
Give your mind some space and let it breathe.
If you’d like guided support, download the free Flow Forward Starter Guide and join the waitlist for a discount on the Overwhelm Relief Kit. It gives you structure without pressure — a soft place to land when your brain feels full.
Take care Until next time
Amber x